1.21.2011

Does Your Peacock Have Sole?


A "Peacock Experiment" from our guest blogger, Neil Patrick...
Guys, are you still not buying "The Peacock Theory"?  Try this one on for size.  Here is a little peacock experiment for you.  I must admit, I was a little apprehensive about delving into experimentation on only the third entry about the Peacock Theory, but I'm sure there are at least a few "Peacock" prodigies out there that can handle this.  Nevertheless, pay close attention!  Follow along.  Allow me to be the ambassador of your Peacock!
This experiment requires you to first clad yourself in business attire.  Work clothes, if you will.  (Hmmm...still to vague?  Unemployment is high...ugh, ugh).  Throw on a nice pair of slacks and a "PEACOCKLESS" button down (or up...same difference).  If you don't own these items by this weekend, then borrow them from your Dad (borrow his iron too, Geez!).  Go with a white shire as to display absolutely ZERO peacock.  Add a solid colored tie (remember, ZERO peacock) for extra effect. Oh, shouldn't have to say this but, WEAR A DAMN BELT!  I mean, the pants have loops for a reason...
The key here is to present the allusion that you just got off work and happy hour with "The Guys" turned into a night out.  It is not imperative, but will be very advantageous if all of your "Guys" participate.  Group participation will emanate the "Bachelorette Party Effect".  You know, a bunch of girls, acting crazy, drinking from penis straws.  Yup, that effect.  (Side note:  women is peacocks too...go ahead and dust 'ya shoulders off).
Last item.  Forget the boring loafers, boat shoes, "Aldo-wear" and reference the image above.  Every guy should go to the gym, so running shoes are a must anyway.  Practically always justifies the purchase.  Here's the deal. Go to the Nike ID tab at Nike.com, use all bright colors and vomit them about your new shoes.  Stay away from pinks and purples.  You will get negative peacock points if women perceive you as "A WHITE TIGER SHORT OF AN ACT IN VEGAS."  Sorry Siegfried.  Sorry Roy.
Fellaz, women notice footwear!  During this experiment, even women who are unavailable, uninterested and think they are unattainable will take notice as well.  At some point a woman should ask you, "Hey, what's up with the tennis shoes?"  The dialogue should go as followed:
GUY:  "Funny Story....(nothing that I tell you to say is remotely humorous, but when you say FUNNY together with STORY to a woman who has fallen into your peacock trap at a bar, everything in that extra X chromosome of her's conditions her to hear you out.). {ASIDE:  with fears of avoiding conversation with the non-peacock'd man who just bought her and her friends a drink, chances are she will be primed and ready for "Storytime"}
GUY:  "Funny Story, the fellaz called me when I was driving home from work and said we were going out to "CHASE SOME TAIL TONIGHT"
GIRL:  (brief pause) (don't let her speak!  Her input can only derail the "Peacock Train"...So, keep chuggin')
GUY:  "So I figured if I am going to CHASE TAIL, then I might as well wear comfortable shoes" (look down at your shoes and get a quick glimpse of her shoes.  If she is wearing heels then you are money) (smile and turn)
GUY:  (turn back around quickly and say) "Sorry....what's your name again?" (shake handgs and then turn and walk away)
Let that simmer.  Let the peacock slow cook on this one.  Why?  (Ooooooh me me, over here! I know this one).  Your peacock became a conversation piece and your small script referring to your peacock allows her to digest a much different message than the one you may think you delivered.  Translated into "Girl Language" you have told her:
You have a job.
You have a car.
You have cool guy friends and more importantly, "Guys nights".
You are ardently practical.  (Practicality does not tend to be the strong suit or realm amongst most women, however, the type of women you want to attract will most likely have been raised in a household with a father that is lovingly resented for his practicality.  And any comparable likenesses to "Daddy" is another good point for the good guys).
You workout (or at least have cool shoes that you are planning to work out in).
AND, you are off CHASING TAIL, without even considering chasing her tail.  (the more "butt-hurt she is about this, the better)
WAIT, do you remember her name?  Even if she looks like a swamp-donkey, Gila monster, remember her name!  It's good practice and chances are she may have hot friends. If you remember her name, re-approach.  She will most likely ask how, "The Chase", is going.
This is when you look down at her shoes and tell her, "I figured since you were wearing those fancy shoes, you were going to need a head start."

...CUE THE BAND AND LET THE "PANTS OFF DANCE OFF" COMMENCE.  THIS TOO, MY FRIEND, IS FREE!

1.19.2011

A Fashionable Charleston Event


Charleston's branch of Fashion Group International will host the 2011 Summer Collections Video Presentation from Paris, Milan, London and New York, presented by national industry experts from publishing, design and online media.  You will get exclusive industry insights from industry leaders, all while enjoying a fabulous open bar and heavy hors d'oeuvres!

Tuesday, February 8th @ The Harbour Club/ 35 Prioleau Street
Tickets are $65 for FGI members and $75 for non-members.  The Fashion Group International is a global, non-profit, professional organization with over 5,000 members in the fashion industry, including apparel, accessories, beauty and home.  

Call (843) 696-2688 or visit them on Facebook!

1.18.2011

Ciara, She's Back!


And looking better than ever!  She's fit, happy, has a new album out and is stepping out in some amazing outfits lately.  Get her sleek, sophisticated look here:

Rachel Roy at ShopStyle


House Of Harlow at ShopStyle


L.A.M.B. at ShopStyle




Peacock: Buttons, Collars and Cuffs, Oh My!


Peacock:  Simple, stylish, but not so subtle... 


Remember fellaz, we want to draw attention, but more specifically, we want to draw the right kind of attention!   So, before you reach to break out the furry fedora and the Kanye West Jesus Piece...  PUMP THE BREAKS!!   Ladies, this is when you look your man straight in the eyes, do your best Lee Corso impression and say.... "NOT SO FAST MY FRIEND."   (Ladies if you are reading this and you do not know who Lee Corso is... reference ESPN College Football. Reference College GameDay..  Do some homework.  I promise this due diligence will pay dividends... IN DROVES!!)

Lets start simple here.  Baby steps.  Sometimes just a small amount of Peacock will work just fine.   
Think about the regular, (aka "basic Bob", aka boring, aka run-and-tell-that homeboy homeboy homeboy) oxfords that claim prime real estate in your closet.  Not saying go and dump that look.  But where is the Peacock?  Remember a "plain-Jane" shirt will probably only attract a "plain-Jane".  This is the very line of thinking that will have you well on your way to "Peacock Success".
For those Men like myself that have a slight allergy to shopping, Bertigo and Stone Rose shirts, can be ordered online.  I wear a 4. I call that "Marge"  (Medium-Large.  6'0", 190lbs of sexy, plenty to go around!!).

Buttons: Notice the simple peacock exuded from the square buttons.  Not the clear round norm.  If this is too much for you, wear a tie until you grow a pair.

Collar:     Notice the flare added by the colorful design of the inner collar.  Be careful here. Just undoing the top button will allow enough Peacock..  (Notice I said button SINGULAR and not buttons PLURAL).  There is a thin line between your peacock saying "Tubbs and Crockett"  and 70's male porn star.   No?  No?  C'mon!! Tubbs and Crockett?  Miami Vice??  (Insert head nod and laugh here for those who still don't comprehend the reference)!!


Cuffs:  Here is the KICKER.  For some strange reason women notice men's hands.  Trust me, they do.  Don't ask why??   Are you serious?  I said don't ask why!!!!  Okay, okay, lets speculate.   Maybe it is because despite all concerns of communicable diseases, Americans have adopted shaking hands of all things as custom.  Perhaps it is the blame of Urban Myths regarding the correlation of man's "Hand size" to his other blessings, inked by the various popular magazines to which women religiously subscribe.  Just saying...Just speculatin'.  Whatever the reason, women will notice the next time you reach out for a drink at the bar if the peacock on your cuffs are on, "Hammer Hammer Hammer"  (can't end this post with a Soulja Boy reference)!

Food for Peacock Thought:  My Fellow Peacock Men, with a double application of Right Guard odor and sweat blocking defense, please join me with raised hands, and the utmost opportunistic confidence the next time the DJ plays "All I do is Win".    ALL PEACOCK'D CUFFS GO UP......... AND THEY STAY THERE... AND THEY STAY THERE.

Thank you to our resident peacock and guest blogger, Neil Patrick!

1.17.2011

Guys: It's All About Your Peacock!


Thank you to our resident peacock, Neil Patrick, for this one...


Peacock Theory is a concept adapted from evolutionary science which studied why male peacocks had such exceptionally bright, rainbow plumage compared to female ones with dull plumage. Anyone who has ever seen a male peacock will no doubt have noticed how colorful and bright peacock plumage is. But the true purpose for this colorful display isn't just for aesthetic purposes, it is there to attract females and the brighter and bigger the plumage, the more attractive the male peacock will be to females.


Anyone mildly familiar with "the pickup artist" from the show on VH1.. (no judgements here... raise your hand if you did) WAIT.... hold on... why am i the only one with my hand up???!?!?! I digress... Anyone familiar with the show or the book or even the theory.. understands how dressing flashy or adding extra flair to an outfit can aid in attracting women during a night out on the town. BUT!!!!... LETS BE CLEAR.. LIKE ALL THINGS IN LIFE, THE PEACOCK THEORY EVOLVES AS WELL. (the JONES' are off and running... I suggest you keep up.)

The next few days I will be assisting Greta Pierson with a few entries that should help any and all guys benefit, and at the very least comply, with the PEACOCK THEORY. We will be focusing on both examples of good and bad PEACOCK as well as what your PEACOCK should/shouldn't be saying. As you might assume, your PEACOCK of your 20's conveys a much different message in your 30's!!

Example:  IF you are pushing 30 and you have so much as the slightest lapse in judgement that leads you to contemplate wearing a graphic t-shirt that could seemingly fit your prepubescent nephew in hopes to attract an eligible bachelorette.... Think again... Besides "WHAT A Douche Bag", among many other terms of inendearment used in todays pop-culture arena, your PEACOCK might say "HI... I SPEND ALL THE MONEY I SHOULD BE CONTRIBUTING TO MY 401K AT GNC.. I'M A KEEPER"!!!! THIS ONE IS FREE!!



1.08.2011

Move Over Statement Necklace

And make some room for the statement earring!  It's time to trade in those statement necklaces for some big ass earrings this year.  An easy way to update your wardrobe is with a fabulous pair of earrings.  Your favorite boutique is sure to be stocked up in all shapes and sizes and don't forget to keep an eye out for a fabulous vintage pair, a la 1970!